I don't hate your kid. I really don't. It's adorable to watch him bumbling up the subway stairs all on his own, with his tiny chicken legs straining with each step. His little muscles are pumping with such determination, maybe he'll grow up to be champion mountain climber. This is a great moment for him and your family. Wow, look at him go. You should be proud of him for the accomplishment. I'm proud of him.
But it's fucking rush hour. It's gonna take me 15 minutes to get up to the surface because of this log jam. Pick up your god damned kid before he gets punted Reggie Roby style up the stairs. Thanks.
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